Santa: Naughty or Nice?

As Christmas is ever-nearing, I would like to take some time and pontificate about Santa Claus. I grew up loving that jolly old man. He was the greatest. Every year he brought us the nicest toys. I loved Santa and all of the magic that surrounds him, but lately I have been wondering if I really should have opened my heart to him as easily as I did. After all, why is he making a list of all of the naughty and nice kids? How does he do it? Is Santa Claus spying on me? Does he know that yesterday I didn't clean the toilet like I promised I would? Is there a secret network of santa-spies that are gathering information about me? Is there someone out there reading this blog right now and creating a dossier about me for Santa Claus? Who gave Santa all the power to judge me? Why is he judge, jury, and executioner? I don't remember voting for him (and I even voted when I was in Bazil via absentee ballot)? Does that make Santa a communist dictator? He does have all of those elves working for him. Are they political prisoners forced to labor for speaking out against "Santa?" It is about time that we ask ourselves a very serious question: "Is Santa Claus naught or nice?"